I Ain't Gon' Hold You Sis: Colorism Only Happens When You're Dark Skinned
By Dr. Donna Oriowo @cocoabutter_hairgrease
Things We Know & Generally Agree On
In many areas of our lives, we take certain things to be given.
It is a given for example, that sexism is the thing that happens to women. We know it to be true because there is power associated with being a man. We know because men dominate politics, get more lines to speak, get to have multi million dollar adventure movies, get to play god—in movies, in homes, in life. We know sexism is, for the most part, unidirectional. We know that men benefit from it and that women are still striving toward equality. With this, women generally don’t complain about the actions our government has taken to ensure that women are represented. We know it is necessary. Those living with the masculine privilege are even becoming more vocal about what they see, and recognize their privilege. (Don’t get me wrong, there is still a LONG assed way to go)
Another thing we have taken as a given, though it has been many times contested, is that racism is a thing that happens to Black people. And just like with sexism, we know it to be unidirectional because prejudice plus power is involved. We know there are structural systems which support racism. White folk out earn Black and brown people, they dominate politics, they are who is seen in movies and media. We also know affirmative action to be the legislation created to help smooth out an uneven playing field. We hear fewer people complaining when they hear those words: Black Lives Matter, because with everything that has happened so far this year, you have to be pretty damn obtuse not to understand why. The point is, reverse racism seems to have reversed itself right out of the conversation.
We have an understanding that being a white man is considered the pinnacle of almost guaranteed success. At times, it can even be a joke that if you are a white man, and you are not doing marginally well in life, it is from a lack of trying, not a lack of opportunities. This world was designed for male bodies and white skin to thrive, not merely survive. White women get success in whiteness and benefit from affirmative action, too. Because though the whiteness of their skin can grant them access, their bodies are still not male bodies. Black men have the right bodies, but the wrong skin color. White women and Black men get partial “wins” for how they more closely relate to White Male Power.
Black women…not so much.
I am Vexed
In the end, we have a good understanding of how racism and sexism can impact someone. We understand it well, if it’s one of these isms. As a matter of fact, we speak more about the intersectionality of isms everyday and how they can make someone's life multiply harder from the intersections of various isms. What vexes me is that as much as we, especially Black women, understand ALL of that, that I still see so many of us talk about colorism like it's bidirectional. Like light skin people (lighter than a brown paper bag, historically) can and do experience colorism. We don’t say that white people experience racism or that men experience sexism, but somehow with this particular ism, there is a fight for the right to be marginalized?
It is as though there is a fight to believe that all Black people, regardless of their hue, experience the same Black experience, like our coloring doesn't play a huge role in those lived moments. The only thing that comes to mind as to why this noxious belief exists is, the same way we have branded the ideas of mansplaining and toxic masculinity for men who don’t know better or are too steeped in their privilege, the same way we talk about white fragility in white folk who don’t seem to know better or are too steeped in their privilege to see more, is there must be a component of that privilege and sensitivity in the Black community, light fragility. This same, almost perverse need to be at the center the way men do, the way white people do. To not lose their place or need to take responsibility for unearned privileges. These are folk who, when someone says look at my suffering, say no, look at my suffering. I suffer, too. As though someone said you don’t. Only wanting to talk about your suffering when you feel someone else is being centered and you are being blamed.
In case you didn't know, I will say it again plainly here:
Colorism, like sexism, like racism, is UNIDIRECTIONAL. It is what happens to folk darker than a brown paper bag.
While light skin folk can experience prejudice based on their skin tone, while they may hurt and suffer, in the end, a world made for whiteness will accept lightness as a consolation prize before taking in the darkest of hues. Colorism is reserved for the darkest among us. For the those darker than that Brown Paper Bag. For those of us who would have been denied entry to churches, colleges, special clubs, sororities, and fraternities. For those of us who are more likely to suffer at the hands of overzealous cops on sight. For those of us who are never asked “what are you” because there was already a commitment from others to treat us as blackity Black-- whether with love or hate. It is for those of us who earn less than lighter skinned folk, who are often not seen at the center as being pretty, but get to be the light skinned main characters sidekick, for those of us who suffer differently and more by the hands of white supremacy.
Quick History Review
The progeny of white slave masters and enslaved Black folk were often treated as an intermediary class between whites and blacks. Called quadroons, octoroons, etc., the often lighter skinned offspring, were considered smarter and more beautiful. More likely to be educated and more likely to be freed after many years of slavery. Hair Story by Ayana Byrd and Lori Tharps has more of the info.
Does this mean it was easy to be a light skinned or mixed-race slave? No. It means that it was different. No one is taking your Blackness by reminding you that there are real, tangible benefits to being lighter skinned in this world. We are saying that these unearned benefits means that skin tone privilege is part of your story in a way that it is not for someone darker. I am saying that light fragility, like how Robin DiAngelo defines white fragility, is a state in which minimum colorism based stress becomes intolerable triggering defensive moves including but not limited to argumentation, silence, and leaving stress inducing situations, in order to reinstate equilibrium. To put it plainly, light skinned folk get in their feelings, feel a way, get triggered and move into denying the dark skinned experience, or even move into arguing, trying to recenter the conversation on themselves, or leaving because they are feeling too much stress (i.e. they cannot handle being told that there are priviliges to being light skinned and don’t want to identify with that). Colorism based stress is related to an interruption to what is familiar/comfortable (read: privilege). Interruptions to being able to ignore colorism and the privilege it upholds in daily life can look like: C
Someone suggesting that “preferences” and viewpoints are based in colorism or racial hierarchy
Darker skinned people talking frankly about their experiences with colorism
Darker skinned people choosing not to protect the feelings or center the experiences of lighter skinned individuals
Acknowledgement that access is not equal based in ones skin tone
Darker skinned bringing up the skin tone of lighter skinned individuals—especially to point out privilege
These occurrences can make lighter skinned folk get in their feelings and try to do everything in their power to remove themselves from that discomfort, instead of sitting in the reality of Blackness someone darker skinned might present to them. And to be frank, that shit is tiring.
In the living of our dark, brown, and light skinned lives, I would remind folk that the definition of colorism, as defined by Hunter in 2002 is this: the hierarchical system in place in which lighter skin is privileged over darker skin. Which means what I have already said: Colorism is Unidirectional. Light skinned folk benefit and dark skinned folk don’t. We are talking about structures and systems. Not just your hurt feelings. Get on board so we can progress.
Go awf in the comments.
